Maxed Out

Years and years ago, I Netflixed a documentary called Maxed Out. It talks about our debt as a nation, and especially, as young people. It also talks about people's way out... and a main method is suicide. When you go to college, one of the first things you see are booths of people trying to get you to sign up for clubs, organizations, and credit cards. The way the credit card tables get you is by offering free tshirts, or water bottles, etc. if you sign up. Speaking from experience... I signed up for two cards the first day. I already had 4 in my name. That made six. Eventually, it got up to 8. Yes, 8 cards, and over $40,000 in credit card debt... as a 21 year old.

My options: ignore it, bankruptcy, ignore it, pay what I could, ignore it, or suicide. The last seemed like the easy way out. I could just give up and that would be the end. What I ended up doing was a combination of paying what I could, ignoring it, and contemplating suicide. I became more and more depressed, and thoughts of suicide were sometimes more frequent than others, but deep inside, I knew that it wasn't fair to my family, friends, or myself. I eventually went to my dad for help, and he helped me get set up with a credit counseling service to consolidate and lower my monthly payment. That is probably the best option for those of you in debt.... short of winning the lottery and paying it all of in one day... haha. (ps- tried that... I never won) :)

So back to Maxed Out... in part of it, parents of young people who commit suicide because of overwhelming debt tell their story. I will never forget watching it in my bedroom and sobbing and sobbing as I watched it... I could feel the pain that the young people were feeling, and see the hurt that the parents had... it tore me apart... I related on so many levels. It was so TRUE and REAL! It was incredibly comforting to know that I wasn't alone... I wasn't the only one going through this hell. My life sucked, but so did others, and it was wrong. Its not necessary. The documentary shows the tricks that credit card companies pull on you, they prey on ignorant, young people who don't even have money to pay their bills, and they create more bills for them! It is such a vicious cycle.

Please, if you are in a sickening amount of debt, or know someone who is, watch this documentary, and know that there are ways out and people to help you. Its never so bad that you have to end your life and take that away from your family, friends and yourself.

Right now, I am about half way through paying off my credit card debt. I am almost 24, and still have a lot left. I live with my parents because I cant afford any other place, I have nothing to show for what I have spent, not even an education. But I am not giving up, even though sometimes it still seems that that might be easier.

The reason I've been thinking about this is that an old friend called me today and left a message saying that he was thinking about me because he was watching that documentary. And he told me how thankful he was that I didn't chose suicide. That I chose to fight, because if not, he wouldn't have known me, and become my friend. Even as I write this, I am brought to tears, just as I was while listening to his message. I have never had anyone say something like that to me who seemed to understand the gravity of my debt.

Thank you JW, thank you.

grrrrrr

Its a bird...

Its a plane...

No, its the blasted Goodyear Blimp


Its seems that lately the confounded Blimp has a new route when it flies, and that route crosses directly ABOVE my bedroom. And, for those of you who dont know, blimps are LOUD... they are not like hot-air balloons, they roar. And to make matters worse, when the Cavs were playing, the blimp would fly up to the Gund Arena (I will not call it by its "official" name, and that goes for Jacob's Field too) and then fly home after the game at about 11pm, which for most isnt a big deal, but when you go to bed at 9pm, and get woken up 2 hrs later with what sounds like a fighter plane outsied your bedroom window, it sucks!

So, in conclusion, I am not so pleased with our local blimp right now... that is all..

ps- currently enjoying an iced vanilla coffee and watching friends.... bliss!